Tuesday, March 13, 2012

My Superhero is Mortal

Friends,

Daddy had a heart attack this weekend.

Coming home from the golf course...in Florida... I yelled at him for being cliche ~not really, but I wanted to! My aunt called him a dumbass, so I figured we were covered.

As I compose this, he remains in the hospital. He is out of Critical Care and in a regular room.  He is "okay."

When I got the call Sunday night, it was not completely unexpected.

The man will be 64 next week. He has been smoking at least a pack of cigarettes a day for almost 50 years. He probably drinks the equivalent of a 6-pack of Coke Zero a day. He's been on blood pressure meds for at least 5 year ~ I know this cause he had to up them when we moved in for that year. *grins*

It's a call I suspected would come some day... but it is a call for which you can never really be ready.

I was putting the kids to bed and my sister called.  Somehow The Girl hung up on her and when she didn't call back, I figured I'd return the call when everyone was settled. Then as I was tucking The Boy in, a message from my brother-in-law came through on his IPad Touch,"Boy, please tell your mom to call."  Hmmm.

The hair on the back of my neck stood up.

I went downstairs and before listening to the message and the answering machine ~ yes, I still have an actual answering machine~ checked my cell.  I had two missed calls and two voicemails; one from my mom and one from my sister and a text from my sister and another from my brother in law.

Truthfully, I thought my grandmother had died. She has not been well since Thanksgiving.

In that sense, when I called my sister and she delivered the news, it was a little bit of a relief.  No one had died...yet.

Friends, I think y'all know how I feel about my daddy. How I keep him up on a pedestal.

My superhero is mortal.

He will not be with me forever. 

There will be a time, maybe sooner than I thought, when he will not be able to don his cape and swoop in to rescue me.

That evening, in the dark, after I had spoken to both him and my mom, when I knew my uncle had arrived and my mom was not alone and I knew that my sister was with her husband, and I had finished talking to my aunt who had called to check on me, in those moments,

I was scared. I still am.

I have never felt so alone.

I intended to save this to link up with Pour Your Heart Out on Wednesday and probably still will, but once I typed it all out, I needed to hit publish.



30 comments:

Celine said...

Keeping your dad in my prayers.

I feel the same way about my dad so I can only begin to imagine how you feel.

Sending hugs your way.

Heather said...

This is one of the most awful things about getting older - your parents get older too.

Thinking of your family this week.

And fingers crossed that this heart attack was for a reason and motivates your dad to get healthy. I do know Superheros are stubborn though...

The Blonde Duck said...

I'm so sorry.

Ellen Stewart (aka Ellie/El/e/Mrs. Seaman) said...

I get it.

Tiffany said...

It's a scary realization that as we grow older, so do our parents. As we watched our parents say final goodbyes to their parents; our grandparents, we may not really grasp that one day, we will be there too.
Hugs my friend. xoxo

Jenn [ Crippled Girl ] said...

Sending you lots of love, and prayers for a speedy recovery for your dad! We have to hang on to our superheros for as long as possible, lord knows I miss mine terribly. *hugs*

Not a Perfect Mom said...

Oh sweetie...I'm so sorry, but thank the Lord he's doing okay...
praying for you and your family

Melinda@LookWhatMomFound...and Dad too! said...

ugh, I know exactly how you feel. My father is a huge part of my life.I would be lost without him. Sending good vibes your way!

Heather said...

Hi I’m Heather! Please email me when you get a chance! I have a question about your blog. HeatherVonsj(at)gmail(dot)com

Mimi B said...

I hear you! Sometimes you just need to hit the publish button! Praying ever so hard that you and your daddy have many years left together. I'm SO glad you have a hero in him. Every girl needs that!

Diane said...

So sorry to hear this news. Just getting by your blog today.

I will remember him in my prayers. ((Hugs))

Missy | Literal Mom said...

I'm so sorry. Sending prayers his way. I understand completely, by the way. My dad had a heart attack and eventually had open heart surgery. Scary stuff.

Jessica said...

I identify with this so much. My dad smokes a crazy amount and it will be some day soon that he will have a heart attack, I just know it. But? Hes my superhero, my best friend, and I dont know what Id do without him. Glad your dad is doing better!

From Tracie said...

I'm so sorry. It is such a scary thing to see our parents age and their health no longer be what it once was.

I'm praying for your dad, your family, and for you.

Life As Wife said...

It is so hard (and earthshattering) to learn that those we look up to and care for can be taken out of our lives in a instance.

I hope he continues to recover!

DysFUNctional Mom said...

The PYHO's are hurting my heart tonight.
"my superhero is mortal"....that near-about did me in.
I'm so glad your dad is ok. My dad is also a smoker and I worry....a lot. He is almost 76.
Any chance your dad will quit after this scare? (I know my dad will never quit....)

Amanda said...

I'm so so sorry to hear about your dad. I'm keeping him and the rest of your family in my prayers.

I understand. My daddy is my superhero too, and we always say he is going to out live us all. I can only hope that is the truth.

Renegades said...

So sorry to hear about your Dad.

This being scared as an adult is a tough thing.

Babes Mami said...

It's hard when you realize a parent is just a person. I will be sending you good thoughts and feelings and internet hugs!

Awn said...

My dad is my hero too. I hope your superhero feels a little more super and a little less mortal soon! Stopping over from PYHO. =)

Maureen | TatterScoops said...

Oh honey...sending you prayers for your Dad and lots of virtual hugs for you. This post brought me to tears coz my dad and I are very close too.

Di said...

Oh girl - I'm so sorry. I know what you're going through since my dad had his strokes last year. I hate knowing that his time here is not indefinite. Praying for you and your family!

Shell said...

I'm so sorry, girl. I'm glad that he's okay for now and am sending prayers. xo

Ducky said...

I can't imagine... I know what its like to get that phone call you never imagine you will. (or could imagine)

I hope he makes a quick recovery and back to super hero status soon!!

Adrienne said...

Scary. I hope he's doing better! I know how you feel my dad is 63, over weight, and always stressed out.

Andrea (ace1028) said...

Oh no! Oh no! I'm sorry! I missed this yesterday and didn't know. I would have called you immediately. I'm sorry and I will keep him in my thoughts and heart, and I will pray from my little section of life. I am freaked, sounds too much like my own father. I think they were separated at birth and we are sisters from another father instead of mother now. Hugs. I<3 you!

Emmy said...

I am so sorry! That is so scary. My dad is almost 72 and has been in the hospital a couple of times now and it freaks me out everytime. It saddens me to think that there is the real possibility that my youngest will never really know him.
I will keep your dad in my prayers

Aramelle {One Wheeler's World} said...

I remember having that same frightening realization when my grandfather had a slight stroke a few years back. It is a horrible moment when we realize that the strong men we look up to can be fragile, too.

I hope that he is continuing to get better. Thoughts and prayers for your family.

(Visiting from PYHO)
http://the-wheeler-family.net/onewheelersworld

Amy said...

I hope your Dad is okay and can be your super hero for a long time to come.

Slamdunk said...

Reading this late--my prayers are with you all.