Wednesday, March 21, 2012

PYHO: Sunday Reflections

I sat in church Sunday morning thinking about the difference a week could make.  When I sat in church the Sunday before, I didn't know how my day would end... I didn't know that later that night, just as I was settling my children in, I'd get the call about Daddy, thus making the week start off in a terrible manner.  By Sunday, though, Daddy was home and doing well and I'm very thankful!

I also thought about my friend, I've told you about her before. She was at my house Saturday night, as I made corned beef and cabbage for everyone.  During the course of the party, her husband, who did not accompany her, managed to get himself arrested.~ for what we do not know, as he didn't feel she needed to know, but we are assuming DUI, since he asked her to go get his car~ By the end of the night, he had been released, packed his bags and moved out.  A good thing for her in the long run, and something she'd asked him to do, but painful to have happen in front of your friends, even if we did know what was going on.

I find myself wondering when I became the one with the most normal life?  That hasn't happened in almost 7 years!

Sunday afternoon, I went to watch the NCAA tournament with friends.  No, I am not a basketball fan. Truthfully, I could care less, but I'm told this is important in The South, so we went.  While there, I was introduced to someone... a big step since I knew about it ahead of time!  I met his family last weekend when we got together to watch part of the ACC ~Look at me, y'all, becoming more southern by the week!

I have mixed feelings, because I'm still not completely over Cute Boy.  We have kept in touch, even though we are no longer an official couple.  I am sad to be taking this step to move on ~I actually teared up in the pew when I thought about it!~ even though I am taking it because I feel like I need to. As I said last week, 7 years is a long time to be alone.  I am desperately afraid that I might hurt someone and having been the one who was hurt in the past, do not want to be responsible for doing that to someone else.

I find myself feeling unsettled,  little listless and maybe a little melancholy.  I'm not in a bad place, but I really did have a pretty big crush on Cute Boy and when you figure that I married the only other guy I ever seriously dated, I think part of me was really hoping we would work it out.  I'm unsure of how to move on as an adult....how to let go of someone who I really do value as a person.  I'm not even sure I'm ready to... but I need to start somewhere.

What a difference a week makes... I feel as though this week I am worrying about the trivial things, but aren't I lucky to be able to, because last Sunday, I thought I might be facing life and death for a loved one! 

If this sounds a little wonky, I wrote it on Sunday after church and didn't push publish, so I had to go in and change tenses etc... and yes, there is an update on the intro, which I'll get to, but that's a whole 'nother post!



16 comments:

The Blonde Duck said...

It's amazing how fast things change!

FourJedis said...

I'm glad your dad is home and is on the mend. That's really nice you met someone. This situation is eerily familiar. My dad (after my mom up and left after 30 years) really fell for a lovely lady a few years ago. It ended up not working out, but he met someone else and has been dating her. There is clearly no chemistry, but he doesn't want to be the bad guy who breaks her heart since he was on the other end of that... so he keeps on keeping on. It's a tough place to be in, but at the same time, you deserve to be happy as well, and I'm sure whomever you choose, you will do it in a mature, respectable way. Glad you're getting out there and meeting people, watching hoops, and hopefully eating chicken wings (sports in the south and chicken wings go hand in hand). :D

Heather said...

I think it must be harder to date when you are older and wiser because you are so much more aware of hurting feelings and being compassionate and really valuing people for what they bring into your life not just whether they are datable.

It adds a whole other layer of complications! My fingers are crossed that things happen for you.

The season change is always a moody time of year!

Heather said...

I think it must be harder to date when you are older and wiser because you are so much more aware of hurting feelings and being compassionate and really valuing people for what they bring into your life not just whether they are datable.

It adds a whole other layer of complications! My fingers are crossed that things happen for you.

The season change is always a moody time of year!

Mrs. Forsberg said...

Perfect Pour Your Heart Out Post. I'm happy for you, that you've taken a step to find love in your life. The beautiful thing is that you can just keep your heart open and let things play out for a while; don't worry about what could happen. Good luck! :)

Di said...

I can't imagine dating now so I know it must be hard. I think its so difficult to open up to someone and be vulnerable once you have kids too because its more than just you getting hurt if things don't work out. Hope it goes well for you!

Jenn [ Crippled Girl ] said...

It's crazy how a health scare can put things into a better perspective, isn't it?

I'd say, just keep yourself open to the options you have; you never know what could come of it! :)

Slamdunk said...

Thanks for sharing your honesty. I'll have to go back and read about your dad, but I am glad that he is better.

I hope spring brings new joys to you and the family.

Shell said...

I'm glad that this week is better.

I have a challenge for you.

Yes, I'm about to get bossy. ;)

When things come up like a date with this new guy, SAY YES.

Get an attitude of not always saying no. Say yes more often(unless there's a REALLY compelling reason to say no).

You'll have new experiences and be able to move on faster.

Tiffany said...

I'm so proud of you. :) Life really does change quite a bit in a short time period.
Is that the friend, the one with the phone call? He left her. Wow.
Glad to hear your dad is doing better. How is he with quitting?

Not a Perfect Mom said...

ooh! a new boy?
go out with him! go go go!

Mimi B said...

Sometimes it's only a day that gives our lives changes we don't expect! I've been on my own for 5 yrs even tho the divorce is so new. I'm ready to date again, but the idea of it freaks me out. Everything has changed so much since I dated last. LOL

So glad your friend's husband moved out. A long time coming. I hope she will be ok.

Tracy Wilson said...

I'm glad your daddy is ok.
Cute Boy lost his chance, dontcha think it's time to brave the field again? You can be friends- heck I know you come from a Christian background and I don't want to offend you- please take this in the spirit it's intended BUT-
You don't have to marry everyone you are intimate with, and I mean intimate. Not sex...Just really intimate, and close to. Goodness that doesn't leave much room for finding out Mr. Right is really just Mr. Pretty Good...
Get out there and live, woman! You have A LOT to offer...someone is gonna sweep you up & away!

Alene said...

Thanks for stopping by yesterday for my SITS day. WOW what a great challenge here today -- to actually do something with all those things I pin!!! Love it.

Babes Mami said...

I'm kind of glad he got arrested, I've wondered about her from time to time and now he is gone.

Charlotte said...

You always have to be honest with yourself, momma. And I know how devastating the breakup with CB was... but at the same time, you deserve to find happiness, and when you're ready, you can take the appropriate steps to get back out there. But not until you're 100% ready for it.

I'm sorry to hear about your friend's hubby. But in the long-run, I think it's best for all involved.

XOXO and keeping your father in my thoughts and prayers.