Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Worst Nightmare

I came across a facebook post from an single mom acquaintance of mine. It read something like, 

My son and I are fine but we will be off the radar for awhile.

My stomach sunk, because I can only imagine what must have happened for her to have to hide.  After another mutual acquaintance, who saw the same post asked after her, I tried to get in touch with her via her work email and got an away message. I should call... I know I should call... but I don't want to be nosy or put her in danger by reaching out.  Thus far, I have settled for an email message and another sent of facebook.

She is someone who I think, had I been more receptive, would have become a good friend. Her son is known in our mutual circle of acquaintances as being difficult to handle. Even she admits it and is doing all sorts of things to help him, but our boys get along really well.  Her husband, though, always made me uncomfortable.  He never did anything wrong or the least bit inappropriate, but he raised the hair on the back of my neck, so I kept my distance.

I know now that he has a substance abuse problem, which may explain a lot of her son's issues.  That is why they split up. I know since the split, he has been through detox more than once. I know, according to her that he blamed all of his problems on her. I know he held up their divorce and I know it was recently finalized.

Now she has gone off the map.

As a single mom, although I have never ever had to worry about this kind of thing, the idea that my ex might snap and try to harm either me or the children is my worst nightmare. I am so scared for her, because knowing what I know, I can only assume that her ex husband is the cause.

ETA: Since starting to write this post, she has resurfaced. My suspicions were correct. Her ex husband was the reason she needed to lie low.  She is now home and she and her son are out of danger for the time being, but prayers for their continued safety are appreciated.

16 comments:

Ilene, The Fierce Diva Guide to Life said...

This post made the hair on MY neck stand on end. and I totally know that internal dilemma of: Do I call? Do I not call? I want to show I care but how do I do that without being nosy? I am glad they have resurfaced!

Blond Duck said...

That's so sad. :(

The Dose of Reality said...

Oh my Gosh, that is just so sad. And such a nightmare. I cannot imagine having to live in fear like that. :(

Adrienne said...

So sad! I hope her and son get back on their feet and find peace to live their lives without worry.

Shell said...

Sending prayers for their safety. xo

Shell said...

Sending prayers for their safety. xo

bikebanjoandbabyblog said...

That's horrible. I serve on the board of a women's shelter, and I'm wondering if she can access some help from a similar organization. They're so helpful for things like this.

Bev Feldman said...

So glad to hear they are ok. It seems to me that reaching out to let her know you are there to support her, if and when she needs it, is the best thing you can do. What a scary situation for her and her son.

jamie @ [kreyv] said...

Oh, no. That is so sad. I am glad they are okay for the time being, but my heart still aches for her and how she must have to live her life never knowing what could come. :(

Heather said...

We actually had something like this happen to one of my son's friends. Substance abuse became a huge issue and the mom and kids left. The husband pulled some stuff and was arrested. The boy just happened to be spending the day at our house when we started getting frantic texts from the mom that the husband had been let out of jail and was heading to their house. She was running to the house to meet the police there. She did not want her son anywhere close to the house of course. It was super scary and everyone was incredibly anxious. I can't even imagine what your friend has been going through. Sending positive vibes of safety and happiness her way.

Andrea B. said...

Oh no. :( I'm sorry. That's so sad. I send love and huge hugs to you as you watched it unfold and wondered, and thoughts of them and their safety are being sent, as well.

julie said...

That is so incredibly scary; I can't even imagine. My thoughts and prayers are with her and her son.

Babes Mami said...

So scary! I hope that things continue to improve for her and they remain safe.

Mimi B said...

I think those of us who have been divorced worry about our exs snapping. It's a very strange and scary feeling. We go along doing ok for the most part, but sometime the thought of a disagreement going to far on their side...it sucks. Praying for this gal.

Mrs4444 said...

It doesn't surprise me that you had good instinct about that guy. I feel for his ex wife.

Hope Reid said...

Wow. I'm so glad they are out of harms way. I'll also keep them and you in my prayers. God Bless