Tuesday, May 28, 2013

More Observations From a Sober Concert Goer

I am by no means a music junkie, but there is an amphitheater, the back entrance to which is a mere ten minutes from my house, so I make a few concerts each summer.  I got an early start this year when an entertainer who had not been to our area in a few years came into town.... on a Thursday.

Needless to say, Mamma had to work the next day, so once again, I found myself observing others from a sober point of view.

It had rained earlier in the day, which kind of put a damper on the festive mood and we found ourselves sitting across the aisle from the "Family Zone" ~which I didn't realize they had last year when I posed this question ~  so I was expecting a much tamer experience then the one I blogged about last year.

I was Wrong with a capital "W."

Here are a few things I noticed.

~ This new trend of high-waisted jean shorts with a 1/2-inch inseam... that doesn't look good on ANY body!

~ The doors of your F250 are NOT low enough to the ground for you to pee in between.  If you choose to do so, you WILL subject the people across from you to a view of yourself that only your gynecologist should see.

~ I know you have been planning your outfit since you purchased the tickets, but when it downpours for two hours prior to the concert, you may want to rethink your plans... you WILL be chilly and wet when the sun goes down.

~ If you are in a bright pink polo, talking to your friends on the phone, how many passes up and down the aisle will it take you to realize they don't seem to want you to find them, because in that shirt, everyone else can see you!?!?

~ It is bottle-necked and crazy crowded, but if you choose to exit the amphitheater from the main entrance, jumping the bushes and running down the hill, while amusing to the people at the bottom who exited from the side entrances, it will not end well for you... especially when said hill is wet and muddy!

~ Asking "Do you mind?" Before trying to sing a love song to the man standing next to the woman next to you, and trying to slow dance with him to boot,  doesn't make it okay and probably won't end well. ~No this didn't happen to us, it was the people in front of us.

~ I still need cowboy boots!


Blond Duck said...

Ha! Which concert was it?

The Dose of Reality said...

Hilarious observations! Amphitheater concerts are definitely THE BEST for people watching!-The Dose Girls

Angelwithatwist said...

Oh now see I realize we need one of those around here. While we don't have the ampitheater we do have tons of summer concerts by big and small names.. some of which I would love to go see this year.. money permitting..

Andrea B. said...

Cowboy boots! I hadn't even thought of that! I've got a concert this summer, finally, and might need to get myself a pair, too!

Melissa G. said...

This post is hilarious. And I agree the only way to think those high waisted pants look good is to be so snot slinging drunk that you can't see your own reflection in the mirror.

Stephanie said...

Bwhaah I had to stop laughing after the peeing between the doors point before I could continue on with the rest of your post! Yeah, summer concerts are here :)

Blond Duck said...

Question about the ezine-- would you want to do a funny column about like "Secrets of the South I'd wish I'd known before I moved here"?